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So I’m off to a festival in Wales today, just a mini one but I’m going childless, a day of being Sam and not mummy. This in itself is normally a great reason for a glass of wine! So I’m on the train, I’m alone and there is a bar and normally I would be all over it, I would have been reading a book with a couple of mini bottles of wine before getting to my destination and of course in ‘preparation’ for the drinking during the afternoon. But no not today! Today I am reading a book (Allen Carrs easy way to control alcohol, as part of my research into drinking and my habits) but I am drinking sparkly water (which I opened on the platform and sprayed everyone near me with) but being perfectly honest with you, it doesn’t feel right; don’t get me wrong it feels good and I know it’s probably normal not to have a drink just because I’m on a train and childfree, but still there is still that thought popping into my head that something isn’t right if I do not have a drink, if i do not use this opportunity to relax with a wine and that today will be not as fun without me feeling, well let’s face it…pissed. But I’m glad the other side (or voice as it were) is stronger now, reminding me how drunk I might end up, how much of the day/night I might not remember and how rubbish my day could be tomorrow!! I am looking forward to the days events as it is another first for me, a sober child-free mini festival!

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